54: Dealing with Borrowers

An Extract From The Staff Manual.

When dealing with 'Borrowers' it is always best to assume a blank, neutral smile. Remember, Borrowers are not built like you and me. They are apt to fly into irrational rages, threaten to write letters to the local rag, sit in the library until their fines are refunded, and take sole charge of selecting and displaying new stock.

The smile helps. If it fails, say something like, 'I can see you are very upset, Sir/Madam, perhaps you'd like to fill out one of our feedback forms? The Authority take customer feedback very seriously, you know.'

In no circumstances must completed feedback forms be inserted into the Suggestions Box. They can be disposed of as sensitive waste in the usual way, by burning or flushing.

If the situation escalates, and develops into General Borrower Unrest, Revolt, or Anarchy (particularly during half term or Saturday mornings) please refer to: Terrorist Threat and apply the instructions found therein accordingly.

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